Many are wondering why marriages are falling apart, after the glamorous wedding ceremonies today. Marriage they say, is the most significant rites of passage and the most celebrated ceremony in all African cultures; yet, its significance after the celebration is nothing to write home about.
Marriage in itself, is to bring to fore the solidification of culture, bond of two families and creation of new life to both spouses as they procreate to fill the earth. It is to build trust, strengthen the weakness of each other and form a greater part of both partners’ successes in the raising of children, the home and future.
Today’s marriage is of a new look as all attention has now been drawn to the ceremony, which is almost become an event that competes among about to wed couples. It may not be necessary to compare the days of old to now but the tradition of marriage which is; making a home and raising children still holds. The importance of the grand celebration is to be able to uphold the grandness thereof to the end, and not to gulp it all down on the day of the wedding.
A man ageing between 30-37 years lived in a single room self-contain apartment with his girlfriend. He was known to be well behaved and simple thus when his wedding was announced, it was anticipated as to how it was going to turn out looking at his financial status. But it was to the utmost surprise of friends and family at the lavish wedding held by the man.
From stage setting to refreshment and more shocking was the hotel they spent their honeymoon. Invited guests for sure cheered the new changes but family members were left confused looking at the gargantuan ceremony of their very known relative.
Well, after five weeks of the wedding came a divorce from the wife as apparently she couldn’t live in the self-contain she has lived in all those times they’ve been together. The man then opened up to a loan he went in for amounting to Ghc45000, so to have a lavish wedding just to make his beloved wife happy. It’s been a year already, and loan officers are always at his end yet he hasn’t been able to pay a quarter of what he went in for.
What happened to the saying “cut your coat according to your cloth?” So after the extraordinary wedding what next? Petty quarrels over who is to pay the bigger portion of the loan acquired for the wedding? Pretending to be financially sound when actually there’s nothing to show? Wearing the fake smiles and acting all up when your rent is due payment after a year of marriage? Using all the saved up money for the wedding and losing your job after three months? Sneaking to satisfy the sugar mummy or daddy who sponsored the wedding? Why put yourself in all this mess when you can actually have something simple to your very taste?
Misconceptions about having a splendor wedding is causing the delay of eligible young men and women who; on the part of women, fear to become the odd one because all friends are having theirs huge. The men on the other hand, are scared to bear the huge cost that comes along so much that, they strive to save and unfortunately use up all the savings for the wedding.
It amuses one that most gowns, shoes, suit and even jewelries are rented yet there is an unreasonable number of bridesmaids and groom’s men as the ceremony is held at a splash hotel with videos of these weddings uploaded online for likes and comments or the said couple travel outside for their honeymoon. Who are you impressing anyway?
Whilst some churches are helping to cut down cost of weddings others have brought the ‘world’ to the church in that, some couples are looked down upon because they had a small wedding. Genuinely some women move from a church to another in search of marriage but others go in there to find suitors who can afford the wedding of their dreams and if they are unable to reach this goal, they become spare tires to married men or women.
Your marriage isn’t dependent on the number of people that show up at your wedding, for half of them only gossip about your gown and the others complain about your food. Neither is it about those, who have their data to be expired on the evening of your wedding so would have to come and take pictures and videos and post them on their social media handles. Most of these attendees do not care about you!
Marriage is what happens when the main gate to the house is shut with the two alone to face the world without spectators, so leave within your means.